Overcoming Negative Thoughts: A Moms Guide to Supportive Self Talk

In tough times, negative thoughts can overwhelm us, making us feel like we're failing. It's essential to challenge these patterns and replace them with supportive self talk. Discover how to take control of your thoughts and embrace positive thinking to overcome negativity.

1/27/20253 min read

Changing Thought Patterns

Our thoughts are powerful and shape our attitude, our beliefs, and eventually are displayed in our behavior. Through the inspiration of God himself, the apostle Paul knew this and gave us instructions for combating the critical, negative voice in our heads.

Philippians 4:8-9

“ And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise. Keep putting into practice all you learned and received from me—everything you heard from me and saw me doing. Then the God of peace will be with you.”

Did you catch that keyword?...PEACE?

What a beautiful thing provided by our loving Father. He created us and knows how our minds work. He’s telling us how to fight against anxiety right here…and it starts with our thoughts.

What Is Supportive Self-Talk Anyway?

Supportive self-talk is the practice of intentionally replacing negative or anxious thoughts with truth and encouragement. It’s not about slapping a smiley sticker on your emotions or pretending everything’s fine when you're running on 4 hours of sleep, your middle child just put a hole in the wall, and you accidentally burnt the chicken pot pie. It’s about acknowledging your challenges and speaking to yourself with kindness, compassion, and perspective. Think of it as being your own hype woman.

What's the Big Deal?

Rewires the Brain

Neuroscience shows that our brains are like well-worn trails—keep thinking the same negative thoughts, and you’ll keep walking that path. But when you intentionally speak truth to yourself, you start carving new, healthier trails. Over time, these positive patterns become your default.

Negative self-talk feeds anxiety like your kids feed crumbs to the couch. By flipping the script, you quiet that inner critic and replace it with a voice that calms you instead of spinning you into a worry spiral.

Your children are always watching and learning from you (no pressure). When they see you handle tough moments with grace and positive self-talk, they’ll pick up on those habits, too.

Reduces Anxiety

Models Resilience For Your Kids

How to Practice Supportive Self Talk

Speak Truth to Yourself

Replace negativity with truth, encouragement, or even humor. Think about what you’d say to your best friend in the same situation, then say it to yourself.

Negative thought: “I’m so behind on laundry; I’ll never catch up.”
Supportive self-talk: “It’s okay. Laundry is like the ocean—it never ends. I’ll ride this wave one load at a time.”

The first step is awareness. When a negative thought pops up, pause and recognize it. For example:

Negative thought: “I’m a terrible mom because dinner is frozen pizza again.”
Truth: “My kids love pizza. I’m basically a hero.”

Keep a list of truths or affirmations handy for when the going gets tough. Stick them on your bathroom mirror, your fridge, or even your phone. Examples:

“I’m doing my best, and that’s enough.”
“I’m proud of myself for all the things I accomplish.”
“This season is hard but I have the tools to thrive.”

Notice Your Thoughts

Write it Down

Final Thoughts

Supportive self-talk won’t make the messes disappear or stop your kiddo from having a meltdown in Target, but it will change how you handle those moments. It isn't just for you. It's a gift to your family too. With this practical tool in your mom tool kit, you will be kinder to yourself, more patient, joyful, and present for your kids.

So the next time you’re tempted to be your own worst critic, stop and choose kindness instead. Preach truth to yourself, cheer yourself on, and remember: you’ve got the tools you need.